A Moment of Silence...

Pardon the horrible image, and angle. It didn't capture the true spirit of the topic we are about to discuss.
Something that has come to mean a lot to me, something that has great sentimental attachment, something that I have grown to love dearly.
Those pants in that picture. I had a friend take the pic, and while it doesn't exactly grab the sheer awesomeness that these pants have stood for, it'll have to do.

I bought them August 21, 2009. Yes, I even know when, down to the hour that I purchased them, and they've been tried, true and loyal. They've seen me through good times, comforted me in bad. They used to fit, but alas, (and thankfully) now they hang, but they're so so so cozy! Perfect pants for that one special time of the month when your "Auntie "fuck you" Flo(w)" visits - girls you know what I mean.

Tonight though, I was informed that they needed to be retired.

At first I fought valiantly!
I argued with my friend who was playing the prosecution (and I of course, the defense, in the trial of clothing that just needs to go)

Defense: "I've never had a problem getting hit on by men in these pants"
Prosecution: "What, were they blind and holding a cup for change?"

Defense: "Seriously, men used to love these pants!"
Prosecution: "Oh that's because they wanted to take you home...get you out of them... and buy you something that fit!"

Eventually ... after several attempts at defending my old, tattered, comfy pants... and so much laughter that I almost threw up... I gave in and we came to a compromise.
I'm only allowed to wear them when I have monthly company, and only in the house.

*Sighs*

A moment of silence for all of those comfy clothes we've had to lay to rest - those before my pants, and those that come after. You have served us well and your coverage of our assets were not in vain! We will always love you. Trust that. We will still talk about you years later. *Nods* It's true.

Rest In Peace my dear denim. You've served my ass proud!